Stones
I view these undated travelogues and audio files posted by K as stones, markers of a path or a way, but a way which is strange and unknown to me.
— D
In Response to Recent Events
The website was taken down last week and only after several calls and emails could I regain access to the site and its development. My brother has done this. His growing anxiety and trepidation due to the recurring bad dreams, visions, and now unsolicited emails from other affected individuals has left him without a mooring. I listened to his podcasts after his return from Scotland and as each successive entry grew stranger and stranger I sensed his dread, his desire to take action, just as the King did as he tried to destroy the book at the end of the fiftieth leaf. But he will not succeed, just as the King was also thwarted. The Book of Sorren is not a force of ill will. I know this because I know that it has not affected me in this way. To the contrary, the dreams that it has visited on me have been an oasis, a respite from this world, and a balm to my soul. I will not allow K to take the actions he desires, and so I have removed his privileges from the website. He still has control of the YouTube channel and he will likely continue his exhortations there, but he will not be allowed to act upon the website. I do this with no sense of enjoyment or happiness. He gave the book to me. Without him, I would not know the sense of satisfaction, of wonder, I would not know the eagerness of each new day. I will continue the curation and my hope is that, over time, I can win him back again. This book does not belong to me, just as it did not belong to K. I am in awe at its resiliency and its lifespan over the centuries. If I can play some small role in advancing the sympathies and wisdom of Sorren, then I will have achieved a great happiness. Lastly, if M is reading this, I would ask you to reach out to K. Bring him back to the beauty that you have preserved for so long.
- D
LISTENING TO “LOCKED OUT”
The pain my brother experiences due to my actions I do not question in the least. There is no pride here, no joy. I act as a steward. What I do question is his current state of mind which refuses to concede that I was correct in protecting this historical document. While K is now beginning to communicate a more balanced opinion about this, I cannot risk that the work that has already been done will be undone. Early in the podcast my brother acknowledges that the book beautifully makes the point on the importance of family, of multiple connections to the world. Yes, precisely! This is what I am protecting - this beauty, these sentiments which are in such scarcity today. K worries that others may not have the sufficient wisdom, wisdom that apparently he has access to, to survive the twists and turns, the dark passageways of the mind which the book forces upon the reader. I must confess that I have a strong opposition to this fear. To allow this strain of thought is to allow a form of elitism that I know K abhors. He must read these comments and know this to be true. But in truth, I can question even my own words and thoughts. I believe that I am encumbered with a sufficient amount of empathy, and I do worry about the pain of others, emotional and physical, of those I do not even know. But it may be that pain in this world is unavoidable and that the opportunity for insight or revelation is worthy of the cost. I honestly do not know. I honestly do not pretend to know. I will continue to post K’s podcasts on the website and I hope that he will read these words and, in doing so, recognize the man he has known for so many years. I am the same. You are the same.
- D
BECKONING THE SEA
Without question this is my brother’s voice and quite likely these are his thoughts, but from what vantage point, from what distant mountain does he compose these vaporous, enigmatic musings? He laments the nature and trajectory of society, attributing nefarious designs to the “new scientists”, yet he chooses a life of solitude, much like M, battling unseen demons in the hills of our fathers. Is he still in contact with M? He has not contacted me since my actions to protect the book and so I have no perspective, no new understandings to gauge these strange words. The site has received an email contact from a second reader of the website. I know not what to make of these correspondences, their authentication, their motives. The first contact was from a man seeking advice on the interpretation of new, disturbing dreams and the second email was supposedly from a college professor, an admirer and academic of antiquity. I wonder at these new connections with the world. They too seem like waves from the past, ancient thoughts now returning to the ear that will listen to them, returning to their master who beckons from the sea.
- D